My mentee, Rosette, is a delightful and refreshing reminder of what it's like to have your entire life ahead of you and the twists and turns in the road that are life itself. Rosette has taught me how to Skype. No small feat if you know my prowess for things technical. She has also reminded me of the strength within and the choices we make and smiling. Rosette does everything with a bright, sunny smile - even when it's (from the outside looking in) not a great circumstance. Rosette inspires me to savour the moment and live in it and enjoy it. I'm sure that she's not aware of these elements that she brings to our relationship.
Recently we held a workshop for Rosette and some of her classmates. One of her classmates is a writer and here's her version on the day's events:
On Tuesday, I attended a networking workshop at Liaison
College, Brampton Campus. The session was organised by Brescia student Rosette
and her mentor, Suzanne Mikler of Liaison College. They met through the
mentorship programme at the Student Life Centre of Brescia.
The workshop was led by Donna Messer of ConnectUs Canada,
and had a simple set up. A group of people got together. We all agreed to do
two things to the best of our ability - to 1) listen to what other people need
and give them your help, and 2) say what you need and let other people help
you.
I had attended other networking sessions before but they
were intimidating affairs. This session was much smaller, and because we were a
cozy group of ten, I found it much easier to take interest in everybody in the
group and get to know them. It was also easier for me be open and candid. There
were six students and four working adults, all of us at different stages of our
lifes, with different knowledge, skills, and things that we loved. Some people were
more successful professionally, and others had more limited achievements. We
all took turns to speak.
I learnt a lot over the course of the session.
I expected that people who had greater professional success
to have greater capacities to give and were able to help more people in the
group, and my expectations were aligned with reality. What surprised me was
that these people were not just giving more, they were offering different
things.
The less successful amongst us offered time and tangible skills.
The ability to do research, write, do web design, computer programming, etc
etc. The more successful amongst us were offering something else entirely. They
gave information of who needed what and where. They offered relationships, ways
to reach people who might need a skill that those were less successful had.
It was then that I understood what Donna meant when she
introduced the idea of Servant Leadership at the beginning of the session, and
said that it wasn't what you knew, it was who you brought to the table with
you. I do not have specialised knowledge or skills that are rare or valuable,
but even if I did, my ability to contribute is limited to what I know, and no
more.
Bring yourself to the table is not enough, no matter how
brilliant you are. Even Sherlock Holmes, a literary character I love and admire
for his brilliant mind, brought with him a writer who was a devoted assistant
and friend, a dozen extra sets of legs, eyes and ears that went anywhere, saw
anything and overheard anyone, and family in high places.
But the ability to bring other people "to the table
with you" depends more than mere technical know-how. I have many character
flaws, and the biggest one surely is pride. I think that's why I've always
resisted building relationships in favour of "being brilliant".
Trust, gratitude, appreciation, reciprocity, commitment, contribution,
humility... I am mulling over all these lessons once again, lessons I was
taught many times in the past that I never listened.
Special thanks to Rosette and Suzanne for organising this
workshop, to Donna for leading this workshop, and all the participants who
shared their stories, skills and contacts.
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